Immortal / I'm mortal

On my way to work this morning I was contemplating human’s mortality. (What were you smoking on the way to work, Clark?) My thoughts were guided by my recent experience of an Ash Wednesday service where the importance was on our humanness and God’s boundless mercy. Death became an ever-present reality in my brain. Not that I am scared of dying, but just the fact that all creation is headed towards death either slowly or more hastily than others. These thoughts threaded a connection with my Lenten devotional book, Cross-Shattered Christ. Yesterday I read the chapter entitled The Second Word, which gives meditative thoughts about Jesus’ words on the cross, “Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in Paradise.”

The author stressed the point how humans want to be remembered. We live defeating lives in the hopes and aspirations of not being forgotten. Our cry echoes that of the thief’s request, “please remember me Jesus.” Rather than ask to be remembered for something significant, he asks to be thought of when Jesus enters into his kingdom.

For me, I fear being forgotten. I tremble at the fact that my life might be a meaningless spec in history’s skyline. Sounds stupid, right? Well, my pride gets the best of me, desiring to be “known.” Sometimes I wonder if I’m making “contacts” with writers, doctors, professionals and professors for the single fact to be remembered. If this is true, then my care becomes etched into a totempole of desired immortals. All of this is in vain, I finally realized. This is a meaningless search to be known and for others to remember me, even when I pass from this frail earth. Father, forgive me.